Lucky I guess, lucky I can lean on the ones who won�t lose me in the crowd. At least for now.
At least, I hope.
There comes a point where you stop trying after it feels like you have to try too hard, and that feels silly, and you think you deserve a little better than that.
It leaves a bitter taste, and that I can�t stand.
We�re all so wrapped up in ourselves and our own fears. I�m bored with it.
Bored of the disappointment, when in all honesty I�m not sure what I was expecting anyway. Very little really. Just that you�d at least live up to the bullshit you seem to claim. The charm that always leads me astray, and always lets me down and I think �why again? Am I crazy?�
I�m really not that stubborn, I believe people can change; I always have faith. But you don�t have a clue really.
It�s not enough for you to not care enough.
In some way I think I understand. You play by the rules, you�re far too logical. And whatever was there was somehow proven to be in my imagination on some level I think, and we moved past it, or at least I think I did, and now its history, an incredible/passionate/bad memory.
Did I dream you into existence? I wouldn�t be surprised, as now nothing remains, except a memory like an incredible/passionate/bad dream.
But still I wish you would talk to me.
I was never too fond of ghosts. Just vanish and I�ll only ever remember you a certain way, and I�ll wonder where you are and what may have become of you these days.
It�s not that I miss you, really, it�s not that I have temporarily lost my mind, forgotten how crystal clear things became in the light of day. I don�t even miss the dark, the dark came with sleepless nights also always alone.
But as I said, I was never too fond of ghosts.
Perhaps I�m dead to you, was I ever even alive?
